I resisted it for years. I was accused of being behind the times, a Luddite - or at least uncool. All those gibes (or jibes, if you prefer) fell on deaf ears. Nevertheless, I finally joined that timesuck known as Facebook a couple of weeks ago.
Now, I didn't do it to be cool. I have never, ever been confused with someone who was cool. Being with the in crowd (remember Dobie Gray?) isn't high, or anywhere else for that matter, on my list. The idea of social networking doesn't come naturally to me for two reasons: social and networking. I'm not gifted in either one of these areas. In fact, I max out the introversion scale of the Myers-Briggs Type Indicator (MBTI). Look up "loner" in the dictionary and you're likely to find my picture there - you get the idea. Weird thing is, I'm comfortable speaking in front of crowds and have been told that I'm an effective teacher. Also, I've been an individual psychotherapist for over 30 years. To be honest, though, those two things are world's apart from ordinary, social interactions. Those, I suck at.
However, as my wife puts it, "Facebook is ideal for you. You can have all these contacts with people and never have to see them." As usual, she is correct. It's so deucedly easy to click the little button that says, "Add as friend." And there you have it. You have yourself a new friend, as long as the other accepts. It seems that they almost always do, because collecting friends on Facebook is addictive. How many today? Can I break through 100 friends in less than a week? How long until 200? 1000? Fortunately, there comes a time when even Facebook thinks you have too many friends and cuts you off - at 5000. My God, that's not a friendship circle, that's a convention!
Facebook serves other purposes besides collecting friends as if they were so many baseball cards. You can actually interact with people who have similar interests, get breaking news, let others know what you're up to, and even publicize things like workshops you are presenting or books you have published (shameless plugs aren't discouraged on Facebook, or in one's own blog).
All in all, this hasn't been a bad experience. I find it curiously enjoyable seeing the number of friends piling up, looking at their pages and interests, and observing the social web that is weaved as the various networks intertwine. It's an amazing phenomenon - as long as I don't actually have to talk with anybody one-on-one.
(For curious Facebook members, my profile is here. You can try to be my friend, but if I've ever done psychotherapy with you, forget about it. Ethically, I can't be your friend. Cruel, perhaps, but true.)
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